My super power!

You know that age old question - if you could have any super power what would you have? It's hard to choose because so much would be very cool. Like being able to walk through walls, or being super fast or able to fly. But I finally have figured out what my ultimate super power would be.

Ready?

I would love to have the power to give someone an instant case of horrible diarrhea.

TA DA!

If you're confused then let me clarify that I spend most of my time while driving and attending public functions thinking of how nice it would be for rude, obnoxious, mean etc people to get a little kick in the pants from Karma. We went to a baseball game on this past Sunday and we had the evil "HECKLER" in the row in front of us. Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for having a good time, cheering on your own team like crazy and that type of thing. No this guy spent his life looking up the names of the other team and then would yell down to them and boo them while they were at the bat and say really original things like "he what was with that throw, you reading a book out there?"

And it dawned on me - if I could magically give him a case of horrible diarrhea he would have to leave his seat, I could watch the game in peace and it would not be a long term thing. And then it crossed my mind how awesome it would be to give that guy who cuts in front of you in traffic or the really rude person in front of you in the grocery store line an instant case of horrible diarrhea.

"What do you mean those green beans aren't on sale...you know what never mind I have to run here's all my money bye."

So - six years of marriage and I would venture to say I haven't felt this good during an anniversary. So what did we do? We went to an Edmonton baseball game and here's lovely shot of what my supper was - a supper I would not have been able to eat a few short months ago.

Mine was the one with chili, cheese and jalapeno peppers. YUM!

I've also managed to get back into badminton. For ostomy patients we have this groovy belt that hooks into loops on the sides of our pouches and wraps around our bodies. It holds your appliance tight and gives you a more secure feeling when doing physical activity.

It's pretty cool and definitely one of the best accessories I've purchased so far. More good news - my work's health insurance provider covers my ostomy supplies 100% - a fact not mentioned in the handbook but I took a chance and sent in my receipts and they sent me a lovely check. I feel very fortunate and it's definitely a burden lifted. Consider that five flanges cost $40 and you have to use one flange every two to three days and you can see how that would add up. And that's not even everything you need, that's just the sticky part that hangs on to your stomach.

Other accessories I've purchased - 2 diaper changing pads. Sounds funny but I use them to sleep here and at other people's homes. They have saved us a couple of times and saved a bunch of sheets. They're comfortable, small enough to pack and put away, totally washable and a nice peace of mind thing while I'm dreaming away.

I am still not overly happy with how things are going appliance wise. The adhesive is not sticking well and I am making an appointment to see my nurse to maybe try a different brand - unfortunately she's on holidays until September 21 so for a while I will be taping the appliance on with enough first aid tape to bandage everyone in a war torn country and just enjoying being pain free. The "non sticky" situation though has put a cramp in my swimming style for the time being but I am confident that I'll get it sorted out eventually.

On another note - cleaning my closet on Saturday was an affirmation that when I'm healthy God didn't mean for me to be a size 6. April 29 - day of surgery - size 6. September 1, day of blog - size 10. (And even one pair of 14 jeans...) Now a regular person gaining that much weight in four months should probably seek help but I needed the chunk. And so on Saturday I cleaned all the little tiny clothes that I no longer fit. Something I am adjusting too is that I could get into some of my size 8 jeans - but my bag and Chuck need a bit of breathing room so to speak and so I have to get stuff that's a bit looser. It means lots of trying things on and when I'm trying on pants I need to sit, move around, bend over and all that stuff in them to make sure the waist band will not cause problems.

I have also done one flight with my new ostomy - a short haul Edmonton to Calgary and home but Chuck handled it well and didn't expand or anything with the change in air pressure on the plane or anything. And I can't really describe to anyone who is a non-sufferer what it is like to not have ultimate panic when the pilot says you can't use the washroom because of turbulence. Now I don't even care! Traveling is going to be a lot more relaxing than it used to be.